Mentoring March – have you found yours?

Often mentoring is something that just happens, most entrepreneurs are happy to take advice and surround themselves with a great team. So what makes a great mentor and how do you find one that suits you?

 

We hear so many different titles these days, life coach, business coach, growth and transformation specialists, sounding boards they are all there with a specific skill: what do you need right now just for you? What place are you at in your life? It is important to have someone who is in tune with you and your personal journey and that has the knowledge that you are seeking right now.

 

To find a mentor we often look to people we know, someone who has faced adversity in a courageous manner.

This is great, it is important to have people that inspire us, ask them how they make decisions, confront fears and move on. What about our personal business journey? My definition of a business mentor is someone who strikes a balance between expert business advice and the empathy with the individuals personal journey and mindset; getting them personally ready for each step. It is a professional relationship where resources, knowledge and networks are shared to enhance the mentee’s professional and personal growth.

 

Mentoring is definitely not the soft option we take our roles seriously becoming deeply connected and invested in the success of the individual. It is a long term relationship that is built and maintained even if at the latter stages only light touch. A good mentor is always looking to help empower the individual tuning into their strengths and core belief system, helping them shine in the way only they can.

 

Important: If you want a good mentor you have to be willing to invest in the relationship it is a two way commitment! A mentor is not someone that just holds you accountable, you must have a genuine interest and readiness to learn. You are not expected to adopt every suggestion but to listen and discuss to enable an open mind and new perspective on things to take your business journey forward. You are ultimately responsible for your business and a business mentor giving their opinion cannot be accountable for your actions – a good mentor will have terms and conditions set out so ask to see them.

 

So what do you need to look for in a business mentor?

 

  • Someone that inspires you – personal attributes that demonstrate success and knowledge.
  • Infectious enthusiasm and positivity – they need to motivate you (remember this is also 2 way and you also are a ‘weather creator’ in your life so always examine the shadow you cast)
  • A teacher – How well can they explain things to you? Not everyone has a natural ability to teach.
  • A good listener – essential
  • You have to like and gel with them – It may sound obvious but can you get to know them at a personal level and share your feelings, you have to feel comfortable.
  • Excellent communication and people skills – the ability to give constructive feedback and challenge you enough to stretch you to feeling achievement and not beyond your stress boundaries. It is no good to send you into overwhelm and affect your personal well being there has to be a balance. Being just out of your comfort zone is where the magic happens trust me.
  • Someone who sets and meets goals – leading by example how well do they respond to requests and answer your emails.
  • Time – Do they have the personal time to take you on as a mentee.

 

The truth is you probably already know someone who you would consider, looking to your peers is a good thing as you probably already have strong relationships formed. There is no formal system to follow and not one person that will be there for everything. You will need different people for different times and situations in your life and that just may mean a one off session to get you back on track. All of the above are ok – it is down to what you personally need so I ask the question again – What key challenges do you need help with right now? Remember we often focus on the urgent not the important to take time for you when you answer this.

 

I am confident that a good mentor can take you further on your journey than you thought was possible whilst protecting one of your most valuable assets – your mind. Try having those conversations that you only have in your head with yourself with a thought partner and see what is possible. Yes peers and relatives can provide valuable information and contacts but I believe that only structured mentoring can provide continuity in the level of support on an ongoing basis—in a manner that can have a directly positive impact on your personal growth and the growth of your business over time.

 

Here’s why I do what I do – my feedback from a one off meeting to help with clarity;

After just two hours with Angela I had completely decluttered my mind and refocused in a way that completely restored my energy and passion. I left with an action plan which I had confidence could be executed within the planned and necessary timescale. As a result I was then able to deliver the results required for business success! Thank you Angela for putting me back on track with a couple of extra skills gained that I will continue to apply in the future!

 

Do you know the difference between a coach & a mentor? Find out next week when I will also share some tips on the process of how to make onboarding a new mentor easier – clarity from the outset to move you forward faster.

 

Motivation is an Attitude!

We all talk about #motivationmonday, share quotes, raleigh people on, me included.What are we actually doing? Reaching out to and for support, looking for tips on how to motivate ourselves and others?

In my speaking I teach people that we have in fact everything inside us right now to follow our intended purpose / vision. We will always be learning but if we feel so inclined to do something we can because it was there in the first place for is to think about. When we find our ‘job’ in life we stop searching.

The thing about not being happy is we tend to point the finger in every direction but ourselves! A bad boss, the need to provide, too late to change etc..Sure external things have an effect but ultimately you are responsible for your own happiness and how you wish to view the world. On the reverse external things can motivate us and our team, bonuses, perks, cars but that soon wears off after a while. You need the next pat on the back or recognition to spur you on – the truth is the only way you will feel truly motivated and happy is when it comes from inside and not anything else.

When was the last time you heard anyone talking about their job as rewarding, fulfilling, stretching them, a feeling of belonging and for a mission or cause. Motivation comes from an inner desire to do something which in turn is from your why and vision behind the actions you take. Therefore this must be your first port to call on for you and your team; for they follow your shared vision. If your team members do not share the same values and vision for the future as you it will be very difficult to be fully satisfied and motivated by what they do. You can inspire and move people but they have to actually want to take action! I cannot motivate you only help you to recognise the motivation within that will drive action.

There is no such thing as laziness I believe it is just disinterest – desire is lacking. We must reach out to the individual, find out what their needs are and we are all different. It is shocking how many big companies do not have time for the ‘fluffy stuff’, they claim to be a fair company and treat all the same and that is the failure in my eyes.

“You are today where your thoughts have brought you; you will be tomorrow where your thoughts take you.” James Allen

THINK – FEEL – ACT

Everything that is created first happens in the mind and imagination before it becomes a reality. So surely how you approach things (your attitude / motivation) is crucial. Changing the way we think about things helps us progress; therefore shouldn’t we be teaching mindset to help engagement? We want to know who fits in and actually wants to go on our journey with us. If we teach it early enough surely our younger generation will follow their heart and find jobs they want to be in.

Attitude is also contagious, the mood or attitude you show up to work with will spread quickly with every interaction; soon affecting your whole team. So why do we put such emphasis on Mondays. You get a chance to relax, chill enjoy yourself for the weekend, some even moan the weekend away, but then what? Then you have to face the reality of what you have built as your working life; having fun only 2 out of 7 days is not living in my eyes. I believe that everyone has the right to love to go to work, which is why I’m passionate about awakening people to address the why of what drives them. The mobalise and empower them to take action to make changes. It doesn’t have to be massive things small steps taken each day to achieve a massive change in you and your happiness.

Message me and I will give you ten changes that have made a huge impact on my life and my positive attitude. Or better still schedule a call or coffee I would love to hear your story.

Before you go do one thing SMILE, now notice that feeling spread to the whole of your body. Start to notice others around you as they catch you smiling and grinning – it’s infectious!

Shine your light on the world and go make a difference.

Angela X